In Death
by clawswrites
Summary: AU. Sometimes emotions can bring life from grief. Jack/Ianto. Tosh/Owen. Written for "longliveianto" bingo card on LJ.


**Title:** In Death

**Author:** gabe1990  
><strong>Rating:<strong> PG-13/R  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Sometimes emotions can bring life from grief. AU.

**Pairings:** Jack/Ianto; Tosh/Owen.

**Warnings: **Contains character death and rebirth.

**Spoilers:** None.

**Authors Notes:** This was written for the LongliveIanto's bingo card: "Empathy". I came up with the idea when I made a connection to the community and the prompt. I know it's not exactly what the prompt intended but I hope you enjoy it anyway. This is my second prompted story.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Torchwood or any of its characters. I do own this story and the plot line.

Life is full of surprises.

In your mind, you plan out your future and everything in it. Your future career; your dream house; your perfect partner. How many children will you have? Will you have a cat or a dog? What car will you drive? How you spend the holidays – all which seem so important at the time.

Then, in a blink of an eye, all of that planning, that thought, just seems fruitless.

For me, that was the moment I died.

I always knew working for Torchwood would ultimately end in my demise, but I never expected it to reveal the secret that I have kept hidden since Yvonne Hartman exploited me for her own selfish need for control.

We were hunting down a rogue alien at the time. Apparently, the aqua-rayne had taken a wrong turn into our solar system and had liked our planet so much, he wanted to stay. It was too bad he had no concept of blending in and everyone who came in contact with him ended up dead, drowned on the not-so-dry land. Gwen had a day off with Rhys – something about her mother's birthday – so I had been needed on the field.

In retrospect, I should have been more careful, but I was cocky, my body humming with adrenaline for the chase. I should have prepared myself for the enviable actions of the creature once he found himself surrounded. It was obvious he would attack – I mean, I would too in the same situation.

Death, I have decided, is a very dulling experience. At first, all your senses are hyper alert, sensitive, and it all blurs into nothingness. I'd heard all about it from Jack but actually experiencing it ... it was just so surreal.

I think here would probably be a good place to explain my secret. It is what made me able to tell you this story now.

I'm an Empath. I have been ever since I was a young child, although I have no idea why or how. I had over the years begun to understand my gift, through trial and error, but I had no idea what potential I had, what I could do.

Jack deposed of the alien remains, I assume, before they dealt with my corpse – at least, that's what I was told. The only thing I remember about my time on the other side was the emotions in the darkness: the fear and angst and, more importantly, the grief that was rolling off my teammates as they stood over me.

I can't explain what happened exactly, because I don't know myself. It was like...being underwater I guess. Everything is muted and unclear but, once you break the surface, everything is sharp and unambiguous. It was like that for me, coming back to the living, only much more intense.

Intense enough to restart your heart.

As always, the first thing to come back was my hearing.

"...ry Jack...but there is nothing I can do for him now..." Owen's voice sounded defeated and tired.

There was a loud sniff at I often associated to Jack's tears. "I know. You did your best...God, Ianto, why..."

"He died bravely, be proud of him." Tosh's voice sounded strained and broken.

"No, he died like a Torchwood member, and he deserves so much better."

"We know Jack...who should tell his family?"

"I will...just, give me a few minutes alone with him..."

There was the sound of footsteps leaving the autopsy bay; fading the further away they moved. As you came imagine, I was terrified by this point. I mean, I had just _died_. And came back to life. This had never happened before – I never expected it to. I didn't know how to handle it. I couldn't move, or speak; only listen.

"Yan...God, I didn't think I'd have to do this so soon..." Jack choked out through tears, "...I should have been there. I should have protected you. I'm the leader, Captain Jack Harkness – I should have taken control of the situation...I should have stopped you from going ahead...and now you're gone. Now I know how you feel when you're waiting for me to come back, but you're not going to come back are you? You're lost to me now, and I can never be with you again..."

I tried to force myself to move. I wanted to comfort my lover; I needed it. Just lying there, listening to him cry, make me heart ache with guilt and pain. But with every word he spoke, I seemed to get stronger. I could feel the numbness disappearing, feel my life flow back into me. It was an extraordinary experience – uncomfortable, but not overly painful. I twitched my fingers, but it went unnoticed.

"...Oh god, Ianto...I should have told you this every day, every hour, since we started this relationship. I should have let you know..."

I remember holding my breath in anticipation, waiting for what I had been yearning for since I had met the amazing man.

There was a shuffle and I felt breath caress my ear before he spoke, "...I love you."

When his lips came to mine in a soft, goodbye kiss, I wanted to weep. I managed some small movements at this point so I thought I'd push my luck. I twitched my lips and added a small amount of pressure – enough to shock Jack into taking a step backwards and look down at me in confusion. His hands trembling, he brushed my wet hair from my face.

"I-Ianto?"

You should probably know something more about me: I'm stubborn and determined – how do you think I got this far with intergalactic playboy Captain Jack Harkness? I made my fingers twitch and flexed my ankles. Just small joints – nothing major, but it got Jack's attention.

"Owen! Get down here! Ianto is...I don't..._he's alive damnit_!"

There was a cry of objection. "Jack, I know you had a thing with him, but he's dead. I've already checked his hea..." Owen's voice trailed off into shock, "His heart is beating again..."

"What? How can a heart just restart?" Tosh questioned, despite the relief in her voice.

"I don't know...but Tea-boy's coming back to us."

The rejoice that the team had about my life made me feel warm and content inside. As selfish as it sounds, I was happy to be needed and wanted. Once again, I was happy to be a member of Torchwood. We were a family and it truly was amazing.

As soon as I was able to sit up on my own, Jack swept me into his arms, crushing me against him. Kisses were rained along the side of my hair and, when I was able to pull away slightly, I could see tears in his eyes.

"I love you..." I whispered causing Jack to choke a laugh and grin, through quivering lips, at me.

Life is full of surprises.

Even in my adult life, working for Torchwood and all the aliens I had seen, I never expected to be one of them. Jack explained to me, after the incident, about a race of humanoids that had the ability to read and access the power of emotions. He has tried to help me deal with the overwhelming sensation of emotions that the human race is so full off, and I think I'm finally getting the hang of it.

But that isn't the best thing about my new found race.

I never have to leave Jack alone in the world, because as long as I am surrounded by people that love me – that will grieve for me – I will come back to him.


End file.
